Fearless Read online

  This, she sighed, was sweeter.

  Gentle.

  A whisper of a kiss over the sensitive flesh of her inner thigh. A brush of a finger along her still-swollen nether lips. A teasing swirl of a tongue in her belly button.

  Her own moan of delight pulled her out of the foggy sleep. Was this a dream? It felt like one.

  Her eyes flew open as teeth scraped her breast. Then, as she scrambled to put the pieces together and remember she was living her fantasy, Luke drew her nipple into his mouth to suckle.

  Her fingers tunneled into his hair, sliding through the heavy silk and holding his head close as she wrapped her calf around his and anchored herself to his thigh.

  The hair was rough, scraping the soft flesh of hers. His muscles were hard as she pressed tight against him, undulating a slow dance that teased her swollen lips,

  It was like riding on a wave. Rolling wet heat carried her soft and light into a cloud of sweet, gentle sensations.

  It was so good.

  So, so good.

  Gia whimpered.

  Luke reached between their bodies, his fingers finding that sweet spot he knew she loved.

  Her body exploded in a flash.

  Bright, intense, mind-blowing.

  The orgasm ripped through her, quickly followed by another.

  And then another.

  A girl didn’t grow up in California without appreciating the power of aftershocks.

  Especially when they came with a very sexy body above hers, driving each one home with a powerful thrust. Then his body tensed. She wrapped her legs tighter around him, her feet digging into his hips as she pressed herself as hard against him as possible.

  His breathing harsh and guttural, he thrust again.

  Paused.

  Then plunged one more time.

  Gia undulated her hips, twisting just a little from one side to the other.

  He exploded with a guttural shout.

  And she came again, waves of passion pounding over her one after the other. And just kept on coming.

  She should have been shocked at the record number of climaxes during a single bout of lovemaking. But other than the stars exploding against her closed eyes, Gia couldn’t focus.

  Couldn’t think.

  Couldn’t do anything except feel.

  And she felt incredible.

  It might have been minutes. It might have been hours. Gia had no idea how long she laid comatose.

  She could hear the sound of Luke’s breathing, deep and low with exhaustion, over the hum of the air conditioner.

  Woot. Go her. She’d worn him out.

  She’d give a fist pump, but her body was a puddle. She settled on a mental woo-hoo.

  Using every ounce of energy she had left, she turned her head and forced her eyelids open to squint at the clock. The neon green numbers glowed in the pitch-black room. Five in the morning.

  Sunday? Or Monday?

  How many hours had it been since he’d approached her in the bar? How many times had they made love? How many orgasms had she racked up? More this weekend than the rest of her life put together, she’d bet.

  Bet.

  Gia gave a silent giggle.

  This betting thing was working out pretty darned well. Vegas rocked.

  Her gaze softened, a gentle sigh escaping as she trailed her fingers over the sculpted perfection of his biceps.

  He was so sweet.

  Out of the corner of her eye, she noted the dishes piled on a cart by the door. Sometime after midnight they’d shared a meal. Keeping the challenge fresh, she’d insisted he wear his blindfold and let her feed him.

  Who knew having a man eat out of the palm of her hand could be so erotic?

  Tingling desire worked its way over her body at the memory. Of the meal. The laughter. The fun.

  Closing her eyes, she cuddled the pillow close and gave a deep sigh of pure delight. This fantasy was so much more than she’d ever dreamed it could be.

  They’d talked for hours.

  Not as many hours as they’d spent exploring each other’s bodies. But still, there had been a lot of talking. Joking and sharing. Teasing and whispering. She’d been careful to keep any clues to her real identity out of the conversation, yet it’d still been the most honest, intimate interaction she’d ever had.

  They’d shared stories of their childhoods. Compared the pressures of being the only-child golden son with being the middle daughter. They’d told each other their biggest fears. They’d been as naked emotionally as they’d been physically.

  Even when she’d slipped out of her Vanna role, sharing truths about her own life, Luke hadn’t thought she was just average. If his interest, his response, were anything to go by, he’d found her amazing.

  She’d shared so much with him.

  And he still wanted to be with her.

  Gia’s eyes flew open.

  Holy shit.

  He’d talked about next time.

  When she’d let it slip that she lived in Northern California, he’d mentioned a weekend together, said he wanted to take her to his favorite restaurant.

  He wanted to see her after this weekend.

  Panic grabbed ahold of her throat, making it hard to breathe.

  Like Cinderella, Gia’s fantasy had a very definite expiration date. And just as the fairy-tale princess had been too ashamed and horrified to have her hottie prince see the real her, Gia wasn’t about to let Luke catch on to who he’d spent the weekend with.

  Her stomach tensed against the pain as she imagined the look on his face if he ran into her in the hallway at Tri-Solutions. He’d be horrified when he realized that his weekend fling had used insider information—knowledge gained from watercooler gossip and a slightly obsessive crush—to play her way into his bed.

  But as hard as it was to imagine him discovering the truth, it was worse to entertain the very real probability that he’d simply look right through her. Sure, he’d said something about seeing each other later. But he only knew the fantasy her.

  Once he knew who she was, once he’d seen her in her natural habitat, she was sure he’d write off the most incredible weekend of her life as just another couple days in Vegas.

  A million reasons justified the panic surging through her, but Gia still managed to refrain from leaping off the bed and running naked out of the hotel.

  For one thing, her plane ticket and cash were downstairs in the safe. And the minute she let her feet hit running speed, she was sure a scream of terror would follow.

  That’d probably wake Luke.

  And she wasn’t ready to face him.

  Not now.

  Not ever.

  She’d had the fantasy.

  It’d been everything she’d dreamed of.

  The best sex of her life.

  A story to rival anything her friends told her about their sexual escapades.

  She’d never wonder if she was average in bed or could only satisfy an average guy. She’d just had the best and he was spent. She was surprised his dick didn’t have friction burns.

  She’d had the fantasy.

  Now she had to hurry up and get out of here.

  Because she could never, ever have the reality.

  Chapter Six

  Girlz Guide Words of Wisdom…

  When you’re off track, your BFFs got your back.

  “Seriously? You just grabbed your panties and snuck out?”

  “I took more than my panties. What, you think I flew home from Sin City wearing just my high heels and La Perla?” Gia rolled her eyes at Caryn.

  She couldn’t hold her friend’s look for long, though. Because while she hadn’t literally scurried out in her undies, it’d been damned close. So close she’d still been zipping up her skirt in the elevator.

  But luckily the escape mojo had been working for her, from the checkout clerk’s easy acceptance of an extra fifty to take her room payment in cash and delete her credit card and contact information from the computer system, to
the ease with which she’d been able to call from the cab and switch to an earlier flight.

  By the time she’d come to her senses and realized she’d run like a big weenie and screwed herself out of another day of fabulous loving, the flight attendant had been handing out health-conscious alternatives to peanuts.

  She’d called her friends from the plane, stopping at home only long enough to dump her suitcases, shower and change into normal clothes before hurrying to her favorite cantina for some girlfriend therapy. And she’d alternated between freaked out and miserable the entire time. But what’d she expect?

  “Here, this’ll help,” Sara said, topping off Gia’s drink and pushing it toward her.

  They were having margaritas tonight in honor of her call for Mexican food. Nothing blunted self-induced misery like tequila and cheesy guacamole-smothered tortilla chips.

  “Why’d you run? Were you hoping he’d run after you, like Cinderella and the prince?” Jessa dismissed Sara and Caryn’s eye rolls with a toss of her head. “I’m just saying, that’s why I’d run. To see if the guy would follow.”

  “Since he has no idea who Gia really is, following would take a lot more than a fairy wand,” Caryn pointed out before popping a loaded chip into her mouth.

  “Maybe the sex wasn’t that good,” Sara said in a faux whisper.

  “The sex was incredible.” Remembering just how incredible, Gia sucked down half her margarita, welcoming the distracting brain freeze.

  “Did he figure out who you were?” Caryn exclaimed, her expression as horrified as Gia had imagined Luke’s would be if he found out.

  Lovely.

  “He doesn’t know who I am.” Her words were as flat as her shoulders were heavy. God forbid he connect the wild and sexy Vanna with the boring, average Gia. Talk about ruining a perfectly awesome fantasy.

  She didn’t need to look up to see her friends exchanging glances of varying degrees of puzzlement, irritation and impatience.

  “So what went so wrong that you had to sneak out, with or without more than your panties, and come home to drown yourself in cheese?” Caryn prompted.

  She didn’t know.

  For the first time in her life, Gia wondered if she should have stayed home and nursed her grief in private instead of working through it with her posse. She’d always been so excited to be one of the Girlz. Had figured it was proof that she was special. But now she just wanted to be alone. She didn’t want to talk, didn’t want them to band together to figure things out. And that upset her almost as much as the lousy rain cloud of misery hanging over her head.

  Trying not to cry, she bit into a tortilla chip, stringy with melted cheese and heaped with a double scoop of guac. The salty-sweet grease didn’t have its usual tranquilizing effect.

  “What happened, Gia? You got your fantasy weekend, right? And your secret identity is still intact. So why do you look like you were having the best sex of your life, then his penis fell off?”

  Even misery couldn’t stop Gia from snickering at that image. She shook her head at Sara. “You have such a way with words.”

  “Well, unless you want me to offer up more appetizing suggestions, you need to spill the deets. Why are you home early and why do you look like your sex life just died?”

  “Seriously. You need to tell us so we can help,” Caryn insisted. Then, sharing a look with the other two women, she added, “Because we can’t nag you for the sex details until you’re happy.”

  “Or drunk,” Jessa chimed in, lifting the empty margarita pitcher and waving at their waiter. “So chugalug.”

  Gia contemplated her half-finished drink, then decided she’d rather have crunchy grease right now. She pulled over the bowl of sour cream. To hell with the calories. It wasn’t as if she ever wanted to get naked again.

  “It was incredible,” she finally said again, staring at her chip. As if talking to it would make it easier to justify how unhappy she was. Because of amazing sex, no less. Gia wouldn’t have been surprised if the chip laughed at her. “The sex was great, he has no idea who I really am, the fantasy was even more amazing than I’d thought sex could be.”

  She waited, but her friends were silent.

  So she ate the chip.

  Then, before she could give in and take another one, she glanced around the table. Sara was chewing on her thumbnail. Jessa’s eyes were locked on her own drink, where she was making designs in the slush froth with her straw.

  And Caryn looked as if she couldn’t decide between offering a sympathetic hug or dumping the nachos over Gia’s head.

  “I’m sorry you had such a perfect weekend,” she finally said with an exaggerated grimace. “I’m sure it would have been better if it’d all sucked. I know I always hope for lousy sex and total letdown when I set off on a fantasy quest.”

  Jessa tried to hide her laughter by taking a drink. Sara didn’t bother to disguise her amused snort.

  “It’s not funny,” Gia snapped.

  “Why not?”

  “Because I’m miserable. That’s why not.”

  “You’re miserable? Over fabulous sex?” Sara made a show of rubbing two fingers together in the classic tiny-violin signal.

  Even Caryn grimaced then. Jessa’s entire face was now buried in her glass.

  “You’re supposed to be supportive,” Gia said through clenched teeth.

  “We’re here, aren’t we?” Meeting Gia’s glare, Sara shrugged. “What? You thought living out the fantasy wouldn’t carry a price? Nothing is free.”

  Gia’s mind tallied the cost of a plane ticket, a hotel room—at the Bellagio, for crying out loud—hair extensions and a double dye job, a suitcase full of sex clothes, and a painful waxing session. Her credit card was still whimpering.

  But she knew that cost was negligible. She’d be paying off the emotional cost long after the financial debt was cleared.

  As suddenly as it came, her anger faded.

  “I thought payment would be more along the lines of spending the next handful of years bemoaning the fact that no lover can live up to Luke Monroe. You know, until I met Mr. Perfect and fell in love, I figured in-love sex had to trump fantasy sex on some level.”

  Three sets of eyes turned to Jessa. The blonde, her streaks platinum today, stopped sipping her margarita and stared at them all over the glass.

  “What?” Her eyes blurred for a second as she mentally replayed the conversation. Then she flashed a smile almost as bright as her diamond wedding ring. “Oh, in-love sex definitely trumps fantasy sex.”

  Gia wrapped the comfort of that around her like a cozy blanket. There. Something to hold on to while she got through whatever it was she was feeling.

  “The sex is better. The connection is so real. And the talking.” Jessa paused to give a dramatic sigh that sent the table candle’s flame bouncing. “The talking is almost as good as the sex.”

  “Nuh-uh,” Caryn protested, shaking her head.

  “Seriously?” Sara asked, leaning forward so the candlelight glinted off her glasses. “Talking?”

  “Seriously,” Gia said automatically, thinking of the long discussions she and Luke had shared between orgasms. The intensity of those talks had been greater than anything she’d experienced before. She’d felt as though she could tell him anything. Well, anything except the truth about who she was.

  “…Seriously?”

  “Gia?”

  “Uh-oh.”

  Gia froze. Everything except her eyes, which rounded in horror as they shifted from face to face.

  “I didn’t mean anything,” she protested. She had to swallow a couple of times to get past the lump in her throat. Her stomach was knotted so tight it threatened to toss up the nachos she’d just eaten. “Just that, you know, sometimes the talking is good, too. Between the sex. It cuts down on friction burns and muscle cramps. Sort of like stretching between events in a triathlon.”

  By the looks of things, nobody was buying it.

  Jessa was damn near bouncing in her se
at, delight clear on her face.

  Sara looked as if she wanted to haul Gia in for a psych evaluation.

  And Caryn looked as if she wanted to cry.

  Gia reached across the table to offer a reassuring pat on her friend’s hand. Poor thing. She looked as if she’d aided and abetted a potentially miserable heartbreak and was horrified over it. Gia wanted to assure her it’d be okay. That she’d be fine. Eventually.

  Before she could spout the lie, Jessa put her bouncing into words.

  “But maybe that’s it? Maybe that’s why you freaked out and ran away and are eating nachos like you’re trying to win a trip to fat camp. Maybe you’re in love with him.”

  “I’m not in love.” Gia’s words were loud enough to garner questioning looks from the neighboring diners. She didn’t care. She had a point to make here.

  “Of course you’re not. That’d be stupid,” Sara agreed, with a dismissive wave of her hand. “You don’t fall in love over sex. Lust, yes. Love, no.”

  “That’s pretty adamant,” Caryn said, sounding surprised. “You’ve never been in love, so how do you know?”

  “I have too been in love,” Sara retorted, her frown vicious behind the bright frames of her glasses.

  “No. You just think you have.”

  Knowing they were about to launch into an oft-repeated argument over what love really was, Gia let out a loud dramatic sigh.

  Sara and Caryn gave their own sighs, then both shrugged.

  “Okay. So I’ve been searching for love for most of my life,” Sara corrected herself with a defiant tilt of her chin. “But I still know it’s more than just getting naked and rolling around together until you come.”

  “Not if it’s the right guy,” Jessa insisted. “You can roll around naked with a million guys. Nice ones, sexy ones. Cute ones and rotten ones. But if they’re not the right guy, it won’t matter.”

  “Well, a million guys means a lot of orgasms, so at least it wouldn’t be a waste of time,” Gia joked, hoping to lighten the mood. And, maybe, change the subject. Because talking about love made her stomach ache and her head hurt.

  “What scared you off?” Caryn asked quietly.

  Gia looked down at the table.